troy n abed


Home alone. Cold shower. Bathtowel. Beatles on full volume. Mangoes. A free Saturday after a month. And my whole life ahead.
troy n abed

Midnight thoughts.

I wish I could just le-go and have fun. 
I wish I could travel the world.

Mom, may I?

*This is a Russian Red version of the popular song of the same title. First popularized by Cindy Lauper. The video is old and I feel embarrassed for their clothes and hairstyle, but cool nonetheless :D *
not today


The only thing that keeps me going is the thought that there are only about 5 months left for all this to get over. Not thinking about the battles ahead, for now.

New laptop alert!

My first laptop was when college started, and my second one when college is ending
I must be one of the very few people who smile whenever they talk about their college coming to an end. I can't wait! 

Hi there, Future-pritygirl.
               You are under no circumstance allowed to regret what 21 year old you said above. You may NOT romanticize this just because this is in your past now. Or just because you're old and have finances to manage. Boo-fucking-hoo. Independence FTW, remember? Having trouble being your own boss? No. Shut up. I forbid you from telling yourself that college was the best thing that happened to you. You know the things that happened later? Like the new job? The newly gained independence? Or the going abroad to study? FINALLY living somewhere other than above your parents' room? The wedding? The marriage? Being a part of a family where you're considered an equal to atleast ONE person? Yeah, all that beats college. Alright? 


Okay. You can tell me I'm wrong. But I won't listen to you. Life is going to be a million times better than this. I KNOW IT. I won't let you burst my bubble. 

troy n abed


I realize that it was childish, the way I held on to my (stupid) journal title and icons. I'm definitely not going to idolize Lindsay Lohan anymore, or watch any more of Friends. I've changed in so many ways, and happily so. Except over here. I did it today, and it's weird how good it feels! I've replaced all my icons, even changed my default. Look at colourful Troy and Abed from the greatest TeeVee show ever, Community.

I'm doing my best to change everything

Creative ideas for starting life over, anyone?

Edit : Idea #1 is to drink more water everyday. No, seriously - you don't drink enough water.
troy n abed

How to Greet Death

How To Greet Death - Gabriel Gadfly

Greet death
with your hands in your pockets,
slouched back, cool,
collected, and confident.
Wear a hint of a grin
and a dash of cologne.
Say What took you so long?
Say You're behind the times, man.
Say Dead is the new black.
Coffin is the new condo.
Pallor is the new tan.
La vida muerta.

Greet death
with a fistful of black-eyed susans,
butterflies in your stomach,
and two tickets to tomorrow's sunrise.
Wear your father's cufflinks
and your mother's wedding ring.
Say I brought these for you, babe.
Say Kiss me, kiss me.
Say But wait until the sun comes up.
Just until daybreak.
I want to show you something.
Hasta la muerte, te amo.

Greet death
with a knife at your own neck,
chin up, throat bared,
cardiac in overdrive.
Wear nothing.
Wear nothing.
Say Bring it on motherfucker!
Say Only on my terms.
Say nothing
and open your throat.
and bleed to completion.
El final, el final, el final.

I think about death. A lot. To the extent of almost fantasizing about it. It's an obsession. Everytime I'm travelling. With my family in the car, or with strangers on a bus. When I'm home alone. But it happens the most when I'm in a theater watching a movie. I hate going to the theater. I watch all movies at home. A movie is the last place I want to go for a date. I can't stand anyone joking about death. I take offense when someone does. It's weird because noone close to me has ever died, except my grandparents.
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